das lied vom einsamen madchen

deery-lou.
so i was watching the bionic woman this morning when i realized that sometimes you shouldn't revisit the past. or at least if you do be prepared for a let down. when i was growing up i absolutely loved this show. while most boys my age thought steve austin was cool, i secretly admired jamie sommers. i desperately wanted the bionic woman doll. instead for christmas i got steve austin, oscar goldman, and big foot. which of course lead me to sneak into my sister's room to steal a barbie so that i could have a jamie, too. barbie made a much better jamie than the actual doll which looked like a man in drag. my parents however did give me the bionic woman game. that made me a little happy. anyway…so i'm watching the episode "kill oscar part 1-3". this is the episode that first introduces us to the infamous fembots. what a great episode it was back in the day. unfortunately most shows from the 70s just don't hold up. exception to the case charlie's angels. yes, i'm a bit biased. my problem with the bionic woman is that it just didn't have the action that i once thought it did. i mean the first 5 minutes of buffy the vampire slayer has more action than 3 episodes of the bionic woman. and is it just me or does jamie sommers whine and cry way too much for an action hero. as i sat there watching i couldn't help but notice all the inconsistency in the episode. and i'm not even referring to the very bad stunt doubles. here's some things i noticed:
1. jamie whines [as mentioned early]
2. jamie's bionics always seem to be faulty
3. the time of day during the episode is all over the place. one minute a character is leaving for the day and seen speeding out of the parking lot only to return back to the office as if she never left.
4. while jamie has a whole outfit under her wetsuit, steve only has a pair of tan shorts on and must remain shirtless.
5. steve is shown without shoes, then with shoes, then without shoes again. make up your mind.
6. jamie is heading into the jungle wearing a pink jumpsuit. camouflage anyone!
7. after throwing what looks like a coconut at the fembot causing it to ignite and burn a hole in the fembots back, jamie is seen seconds later in the fembot's black jumpsuit sans giant hole.
8. jamie is wearing fembots outfit complete with shoes but when she is shown kicking steve she is barefoot. hmmmm.
9. it seems like when jumping they can only jump straight up.
10. why didn't steve use his bionic eye to see through the fembots. i mean if you have it, use it.

whew. that felt good. with that said, will i stop watching. of course not. but i will lower my expectations of my childhood shows and enjoy them for what they are.



stay gold & be well…