das lied vom einsamen madchen

deery-lou.
so i was watching the bionic woman this morning when i realized that sometimes you shouldn't revisit the past. or at least if you do be prepared for a let down. when i was growing up i absolutely loved this show. while most boys my age thought steve austin was cool, i secretly admired jamie sommers. i desperately wanted the bionic woman doll. instead for christmas i got steve austin, oscar goldman, and big foot. which of course lead me to sneak into my sister's room to steal a barbie so that i could have a jamie, too. barbie made a much better jamie than the actual doll which looked like a man in drag. my parents however did give me the bionic woman game. that made me a little happy. anyway…so i'm watching the episode "kill oscar part 1-3". this is the episode that first introduces us to the infamous fembots. what a great episode it was back in the day. unfortunately most shows from the 70s just don't hold up. exception to the case charlie's angels. yes, i'm a bit biased. my problem with the bionic woman is that it just didn't have the action that i once thought it did. i mean the first 5 minutes of buffy the vampire slayer has more action than 3 episodes of the bionic woman. and is it just me or does jamie sommers whine and cry way too much for an action hero. as i sat there watching i couldn't help but notice all the inconsistency in the episode. and i'm not even referring to the very bad stunt doubles. here's some things i noticed:
1. jamie whines [as mentioned early]
2. jamie's bionics always seem to be faulty
3. the time of day during the episode is all over the place. one minute a character is leaving for the day and seen speeding out of the parking lot only to return back to the office as if she never left.
4. while jamie has a whole outfit under her wetsuit, steve only has a pair of tan shorts on and must remain shirtless.
5. steve is shown without shoes, then with shoes, then without shoes again. make up your mind.
6. jamie is heading into the jungle wearing a pink jumpsuit. camouflage anyone!
7. after throwing what looks like a coconut at the fembot causing it to ignite and burn a hole in the fembots back, jamie is seen seconds later in the fembot's black jumpsuit sans giant hole.
8. jamie is wearing fembots outfit complete with shoes but when she is shown kicking steve she is barefoot. hmmmm.
9. it seems like when jumping they can only jump straight up.
10. why didn't steve use his bionic eye to see through the fembots. i mean if you have it, use it.

whew. that felt good. with that said, will i stop watching. of course not. but i will lower my expectations of my childhood shows and enjoy them for what they are.



stay gold & be well…

everything

deery-lou.
t-shirt of the week as worn by heather, age 7.



stay gold & be well…

not your bottle

deery-lou.
so i think i had a date this week. hehe. it was with a seven year old girl, sarah. she's not one of my students but she decided to eat lunch with me. she was the only student in my classroom. when i sat down she decided to move right next to me. she asked me all sorts of questions. she loves salad. i think she went back for thirds. she thought everything was yummy. even the potatoes with tiny fish. i had to pass on that one. i played some music during lunch…it was kristin hersh. she likes music, too. we were later joined by elizabeth, one of the korean teachers. she told me that sarah keeps talking about me at home. i'm not quite sure, mostly due to the translation, but i think sarah has been making snacks for me. i have yet to see any of these so called snacks yet.hehe. every time i see sarah she is always saying hi and hugging me. kids are so cute.

friday we celebrated the march birthdays. we had three birthday kids: heather, andy, and esther. the morning was spent singing songs, passing out presents, and eating cake and snacks. needless to say the rest of the day was quite unproductive. i had a little dance party with one of my classes. every time i stopped the music they had to freeze. i was hoping this would counteract all the sugar. i think it only made it worse. they seemed to have a blast even though ethan teacher was worn out. next friday we are having an easter celebration. i'm hoping for an easter egg hunt. we'll see if that happens.

here are a few shots from the birthday party. i only got three cuz my battery died. hmmm. me thinks its time to replace it.

heather, esther, & andy

esther

me & caleb

stay gold & be well…

the have nots

o-town gang

deery-lou.
didn't take a whole lot of photos during my brief visit to the states. my mind was clearly on something else. but here are the few i did manage to take:

click here for florida pix

stay gold & be well…

feeling good

deery-lou.
wow. i'm not even sure where to begin. my whole trip home feels like a distance dream. i'm not even sure what day it is. all i do know is that i'm really glad i went. attending my grandmother's funeral and being with family was something that i needed to do. and it felt right. its unfortunate how circumstances like this brings family together. gone are the days when families live relatively close. we are now scattered across the u.s. and beyond. it great seeing my aunts, uncles, and cousins. i haven't seen them for over eight years. it was especially nice to see uncle jim and his family. i had become quite close to them when i lived in baltimore. i usually spent my weekends with them. they were always good to me and invited me to join them on their family outings. i had many dinners with them, went to a few of david's soccer games, and spent many afternoons drinking beers and chatting with jim. for that i'm truly grateful. i wouldn't trade that opportunity for anything. i'm also thankful that i got to be there for my mom and sister. my grandmother's death is going to be especially hard on my mom. she has taken care of her for so long now. not quite sure it has really sunk in yet for my mom. she appeared strong. i'm sure that day will come and i hope she knows that i'm only a phone call away if she needs to talk.

the service we had for my grandmother was nice. its always strange looking at a body just laying there. there are times when you expect her to just sit up and start talking. there's also a strangeness to how cold and hard the bodies are. when my lips touch my grandmother's cheek a chill ran through my body. standing over the coffin and said a few words to her and then tuck a note i had written her under her arm which cradles a stuffed seal i had given to my sister so many years ago. apparently my grandmother had become quite fond the seal and carried it with her. and now it would be going with her. it was hard watching my uncle jim speak at the service. it was the first time i had ever seen him so emotional. he spoke so elegantly about my grandmother. and every once in awhile stopping to collect himself. i could tell it hard for him and i was glad to be there to support him. the hardest and most emotional part was watching my sister speak. she had asked beforehand to read what she had wrote. it was tough for him to read it to myself yet alone to hear her speak the words. i knew it took a lot for her to get up there. i'm so proud of her. we spent the rest of the day back at the hotel catching up with everyone. beers were drank. food eaten. it was all quite nice.

on thursday everyone left. my friend tracy picked up in the morning and took me back to her house. i spent the day there watching the style channel. i too exhausted to do anything. although i did manage to get out and get some chick filet. a chicken sandwich never tasted so good. that night we headed up to st. andrews pub for some cocktails. we were joined by jay, karen, and hillary. it was great to see everyone. even though it was somewhat of a tease for on friday i'd be heading back. its always nice to catch up with old friends. especially the ones i know would do anything for me and these guys would. i'm so lucky to have them in my life and look forward to longer visit with them next time.

on my way to orlando, while sitting in the tokyo airport i watched all the people milling about. there were couples, friends, families, and those traveling solo. it made me yearn for that time in my life when i have a chance to take a trip with a partner. as i sat there i started to become absorbed with the people around me. wanting to know their stories and often times inventing my own for them. before leaving seoul i had my hair product taken. not realizing there was a 100ml rule on liquids i tried to smuggle a 200ml onto the flight. i tried to argue that it was half full making it 100ml but they wouldn't budge. not sure why i cared so much except for the fact that it works real good in my hair. needless to say i didn't was my hair for the next three days. hehe. during this trip i also noticed that flying makes me extremely hungry and thirsty. its as if i can't get enough. on the way back to korea i ended up dropping $20 on snacks. sad. then there's the lack of sleep i encounter. i can seem to fall asleep for any length of time. my favorite time to sleep is right before take off. then i'm up for the rest of the duration. could it be i'm afraid i might miss out on that delicious meal they are going to serve? who knows. however, i did manage to catch a few more winks then normal on this trip. a lot of that could be due to the fact that the movie selection sucked and i finished my book on the way there. i did manage to read both interview and entertainment weekly from cover to cover. overall it was 3 planes to orlando and 3 planes back. thats a hell of a lot of planes if you ask me. on the way to orlando from newark we literally sat in the plane for an hour before leaving the runway. apparently we were waiting for some flight attendants. once they came we had to taxi for quite awhile before taking off. to make matters worse i was surrounded by high school students returning from spring break. at one point the girl in my row asked if i was all right. she said she thought i was about to freak out. i laughed and told her not to worry. there was no freak out coming. at least not yet.

i got quite a few comments about my glasses. besides my family one of the flight attendants said they were cute.hehe. my nephew who's 4 told me he liked my shoes, shirt, and hair. meanwhile his sister said my hair looked funny. what cuties. i can't believe how big they are getting. the children were very well behaved. my nephew got his hands on my cousins cell phone and keep taking pictures of everyone. then he tried to make a few calls.

while sitting in tokyo waiting for my flight back to korea my shoe broke. the back part of the sole came off. so when i walk it was like wearing a clog or something. i tried securing it with some rubber bands i had but it didn't work. i'm just thankful they managed to stay together so that i didn't have to walk barefooted home.

Feeling Good
Nina Simone

Birds flying high you know how I feel
Sun in the sky you know how I feel
Reeds driftin on by you know how I feel

Its a new dawn
Its a new day
Its a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good

Fish in the sea you know how I feel
River running free you know how I feel
Blossom in the tree you know how I feel

Its a new dawn
Its a new day
Its a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good

Dragonfly out in the sun you know what I mean, don't you know
Butterflies all havin fun you know what I mean
Sleep in peace when day is done
That's what I mean

And this old world is a new world
And a bold world
For me

Stars when you shine you know how I feel
Scent of the pine you know how I feel
Oh freedom is mine
And I know how I feel

stay gold & be well…

margerine melodie

deery-lou.
daniel left for australia on thursday. he'll be gone for two weeks. it was weird spending a weekend alone. i do miss him. i got quite use to having him around. i met up with him in suji on tuesday for dinner. his mom joined us. i kind of wanted to have some one on one time with him but the evening was still good. at least i got to know to his mom a little better. after dinner we headed off to a hof for some beers. daniel's dad meet us there. after his parents left we walked around e-mart some then i hopped on a bus back to ansan. it took me forever to get home. at suwon station every bus back to ansan was packed. people were literally pushing and shoving to get on. one girl got knocked to the ground. finally three buses later i was able to shove myself on. i know many of you have been asking for pictures of daniel. honestly i haven't taken any yet. oops. however i did have him send me one. so, here he is…


i received some bad news this weekend. my grandmother died. after some major deliberating on my part i finally decided to go home. i realized that i need to be with family and to say my final goodbye. speaking with kate helped me alot. she has a way of making things seem all the more clearer. so i'm jumping on a plane tuesday for orlando and returning on friday. short and sweet. it looks like i'll have one day to see some friends, too, which will be nice. hope all is well with everyone out there.

stay gold & be well…

37 hours

deery-lou.
well, i survived week one of kindergarten. by the end of the week i was completely exhausted. way too much teaching. especially since i'm covering over at the junior school as well. my throat is pretty much spent from talking/yelling so much. saturday was my last day of privates. they decided to stop them. i'm gonna miss the extra money but am quite glad to have my weekends back. after class on saturday i spent the day in bed watching tv and napping. i felt much better this morning. i actually got some things done like cleaning my apartment which looked like a tornado had struck it. will be meeting up with daniel a little later which will be nice. since i don't really have much to post i thought i'd share a little something with my peeps in cyberspace. this is something i wrote while on the plane heading to florida for bonnie's funeral back in 2001.

untitled
looking down on mother earth
i saw a sight that moved me so
the red clay ground filled with black masses of water.

a perfect rainbow followed my path leaving me breathless
i flew many times before but never had it
affected me as it had today.

the complexities of life now seemed so trite
the untouched ground below me
calling for me to come touch it.

i stared for hours
looking out at this vest land
wanting to be lost.

to forget all that has happened
yearning to be untouched, natural, and lost
like that of a child who is experiencing life for the first time.

never had i enjoyed such a site as this
some 30,000 feet above
realizing just how beautiful this land of ours is.

stay gold & be well…

corners

deery-lou.
all righty. this was like the longest week of my life [and its still not over]. haven't quite gotten a handle of things. it feels like i barely have time to eat let alone blog. i'm hoping that i'll adjust rather quickly to this new schedule. what i have realized is that i'm so not a morning person, especially when i'm staying up way too late. we are still in need of two teachers which means i'm pulling three 10 hour days and two 8 hour days. yeah, not so fun. overall though i do enjoy the little kiddies. today one little girl thought she could spill her yogurt drink and then just take mine. i don't think so. the best part is all the random conversations you can have with them. they laugh at anything. been spending alot time with daniel which has been great. last saturday i met up with him in suji. during dinner his mom and auntie joined us. it was a bit awkward at first especially since there is a language gap. however, the more alcohol i consummed the less i cared. when we left the restaurant we ended up at a noraebang. that makes number 3. meeting someone's mom is always a bit strange the first time, but throw in singing and it takes on a whole new experience. his auntie asked me to sing yellow submarine with her. i sounded dreadful. then again i always think that. both his mom and auntie said i got better the more i sang. not really sure they enjoyed my 70s rock i bombarded them with. the noraebang madness came to an end around 2am. sunday was spent eating, resting, and tv watching.

stay gold & be well…

no parachutes

deery-lou.
wow. i've just realized that it's been 12 days since my last post. can't really blame it on being on vacation because i wasn't. i guess you could say i've been a bit preoccupied spending time with a certain someone. so now it's time for me to play catch up. i'll try to make it quick…

on life
during the lunar new year holiday i met someone. his name is daniel. he's a cutey. we spent most of the holiday together which was really really nice. for those of you who know me, you know i haven't dated much so its kind of a big deal for me. even more so for me to mention it here. anyway…we hit it off really well. it has been some time since i've had a connection with someone. he makes me laugh. i feel very comfortable around him. almost as if i've known him forever. and the best thing is that i really enjoy just being with him. it scares me a little cuz i find myself liking him more and more each day. i mean, come on, so far he's managed to get me to a noraebang twice. you all know how i feel about karaoke! so these last 12 days i've spent either with him, or talking to him and haven't given much thought to blogging. especially when we had more important things to do like lay in bed watching tv and eating. hehe. it definitely does feel nice having a bf. i could so get use to this.

on work
it's been a bit chaotic there. the kindergarten school opens march 5, so everyone has been focusing on that. i'm still a bit in the dark about things over there. no one has really bothered to tell me much of anything. thats the one thing that bugs me about the school. it looks like i'll be winging it on march 5. we had a preview class on wednesday. they told me about it on tuesday. so i had a few hours on tuesday to prepare. it went pretty well. the moms sat in on the class which made it a bit nerve racking. that was until i realized they probably don't understand me. the little ones are so damn adorable. i'm glad i decided to make the switch. my hours will change to morning plus i'll get free lunch. yum.yum. spent the rest of the week moving things to my new classroom. i'll let you know how it goes. wish me luck.

on taekwondo
class has been kicking my ass. now that there are no more children they are working us hard. i must say i do feeling pretty good when the class is over. its the whole trying to get through it thats killing me. however, i did manage to score a massage this week. on wednesday night my tkd class went out to dinner to say goodbye to russian sahbumnim. all i have to say is that kim sahbumnim is the devil. i've never seen anyone drink so much soju. of course, i had to try to keep up with him and it cost me dearly. once i got home my evening was spent on the bathroom floor. i'm so not 16 anymore.

on friends
it seems like every month i've had to say goodbye to someone. this time it was princess. she had a little going away/house party last saturday. i still can't believe she left. sadness. i did have an awesome time at your party. daniel came with me, so at least he had a chance to met princess before she departed. met a few other cool peeps. naomi made a cake. most likely a box cake from the states. however, it was so freakin good. i couldn't stop stuffing it down my throat. hi, fatty. of course the evening turned into an all nighter. didn't get back to ansan until 7 a.m. it's been awhile since i've done one of those nights and now i remember why. i'm absolutely useless the next day.

that pretty much wraps up the last 12 days. i promise to be a bit better with updates. oh, i'm still very much enjoying the new kristin hersh cd.

stay gold & be well…